Thursday, January 27, 2011

i'm tired of trying. just let me know if you want me to be in your life.

-- it's so frustrating i guess, to see two people who have no reason whatsover not to be together, stay apart.
-- i love you.. and you're either going to love me back or leave me alone
-- with all the smiles you brought me, i never thought that you could cause me so many tears.
-- i'm tired of all the games. i need something real for a change. Someone who stays when shit gets rough. Someone to hold me when i've had enough.
-- heart, prepare to shatter, because i think i like him a whole lot more then i ever planned to
-- relationships are like glass. sometimes it's better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together.
-- everything was perfect we were as happy as can be, then you remembered her and forgot about me.
-- a dream is just a dream until it comes true. love was just a word until i heard it from you.
-- sometimes i wish i could read your mind just to see how you feel about me
-- it sucks when a person becomes your weakness.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

p.s. i'm still not over you

--it was hard loosing you, but it was even harder seeing you happy with someone else.
-- true love is letting him go to make him happy even though it kills you
-- i wan't asking for forever, i was just asking for a chance
--i know i have a heart, when i feel it breaking
-- you don't have to apologize cause you're right. it just wasn't working out. i mean, it sucks, and i wish it was different, but... it is what it is
--the more you show the person that you can't live without them, the more reasons you're giving them to take you for granted.
-- you can try, try, and try some more, but it's simply impossible to forget someone who changed your life.
-- time goes by a lot slower when you miss the one you love
-- i am who i am. i like what i like. i love who i love. i do what i want. Get off my back and deal with it. it's my life, not yours
-- the privilege of being a child is that you get to cry over the silliest things, like a stolen crayon... and not a broken heart.
-- sometimes people are the stongest when they have no one to hold them up
-- if a boy really likes you he doesn't care how tired he is. how much homework he has, or how late it is.  he'll still talk to you.
--moving on is not about looking back. it's taking a glance at yesterday, and seeing how much you've grown since then.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

-- here's to the countless nights, i've wasted sleep thinking about you.
-- take the time to love her or someone else will
-- i may seem strong, but it's only because you're around.
-- if i could control my heart, i would stop it from falling in love with you.
-- shit, look who's online... LOG OUT, LOT OUT, LOG OUT.... "hey, what's up"... damn
-- seeing you smile, no matter how much you've hurt me, no matter how many tears you've caused me, i'll smile.
-- i stay up late every night, and realize it's a bad idea every morning.
-- i know it's childish and stupid, and it will probably never happen, but i wish for you at 11:11 every single night.
-- if you only knew how i truly feel for you, you would understand, and you would know that i'm the only one that cares.
-- even though you have walked away, sometimes you still look back to be sure your ex is ok because you are a better person than the jerk you dated.
-- i only hate him because i don't have him, because hating him is easier than admiting he hurt me, that he got away. and i'd do anything not to hurt.
-- i treated you like a king... how come i didn't feel like your queen

Friday, January 21, 2011

letting go isn't a one time thing; it's something you do, every day, over and over again.

-- i thought i was over him. done with him. but then there he was, standing there, and i couldn't breath.
--these feelings i have for you are beyond my control.
--F.R.I.E.N.D.S= (F)ight for you. (R)espect you. (I)nvolve you. (E)ncourage you. (N)eed you. (D)eserve you. (S)ave you.
--stupid brain stop thinking about him. Stupid heart stop loving him. Stupid stomach stop flippin & droppin. Dear me, stop being stupid about him
--love doesn't mean that you won't break up or fight. it means that you'll make up amd make things right
-- some people make the world special just by being in it. i think you fall under that particular category.
-- trying to forget someone you loved is like trying to remember someone you never knew.
-- love isn't planned... it just happens
--when i'm older & my daughter asks me who my first love was, i wanna be able to point across the room and say he's right there.
--being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.
--Everyone wants what they can't have. but if you begin to love what you have, you won't need anything else.
-- we complicate things because most of the time, if your heart has a point, your mind seeks for a reason.
--what hurts the most is talking to him on the phone, like everything's okay. but when you hang up, he doesn't say "i love you" like he used to.
--don't regret telling him what you felt even if everything changed... because at least now you know where you stand his life.
--it's hard to let go of people who are very importana to you. but it's a million times harder to see them fine as you let them go.
--every girl has that one guy she goes back to heartbreak after heartbreak, & nobody knows why, not even her. & she just can't let go.
-- sometimes things can't always be fixed. you just have to leave it alone and walk away. close your eyes and do the best you can to forget.
--i have a million things to say to you... i just can't find the words
--i told myself i won't miss you.. but the harder i try, the more i think of you.
-- if you're really over me, fine! don't text me or act like you used to, don't play me on.. just leave me alone!
-- i'm not walking away from you or what we have. i'm just letting you go because i can't remember why i held on tight for so long.
-- forgetting someone is a choice. Some people can't because they're not willing to.
-- if you don't call me all day, i understand, when you don't text me all day i understand, when i stop loving you i hope you understand.
-- never love if you're not prepared to be hurt, never speak if you don't mean it and never say "i love you" if you don't feel it.
-- i'm strong enough to walk away, but too broken to look back.
-- a smile from the person that you like can brighten up your darkest day even when you know that smile isn't for you.
-- am i supposed to hang around and wait forever?
-- i can't help but wonder what he thinks when he looks at me
-- i love it when he texts first, it gives me the feeling that he's been missing me
-- do you know what is one of the hardest things to hide and to handle? my feeling for you
-- i won't force myself to have a space in your life... because if you know my worth, you'll create one for me.
-- i can't tell you how much i'm so into you... because i'm so scared everything will change if i tell you "i love you"
-- i believed you when you said you would catch me if i fell for you... but then i hit the ground.
-- faking my smile has become more natural than i had thought it would
--i love receiving one new message, and seeing your name on the screen.
-- guys, women may forget what you said, but they never forget how you made them feel.
-- love is not about "it's your fault" but "i'm sorry." Not "where are you" but "i'm right here" not "i wish you were" but "i'm thankful you are"
-- my head is saying let go, my heart is saying just wait.
-- you make me smile even when you're not trying
-- you can miss someone that died. you can miss someone that moved away. but the worst way to miss someone, is someone you see everyday.
-- why would i ever look for something in someone else when i already see everything in you
-- missing you isn't the problem. wondering if you miss me, is.
-- they say true love is worth fighting for. but if it is true love, then why should we have to fight for it.
-- the thing about breaking up is that you always wonder if you'll be missed.
-- it's impossible to give up on love when there will always be that one person who makes you believe in it again.
-- just remember, you were once happy without him; you will be happy again.
-- outside: everything is great, i smile, i'm better without you. Inside: tired of having to pretend my whole world isn't falling apart.
-- i stayed up all night, playing back myself leaving.
-- i can honestly say you've been on my mind, since i woke up today.
-- me plus you, multiply by your smile. minus the drama. a fraction of your heart. i'll solve your problems. we make the perfect equation.
-- you can't walk back in. not after i've spent so much time forgetting you.
-- 3 things i want in a relationship: Eyes that won't cry, lips that won't lie, and love that won't die.
-- you may still have the key to my heart but i'm changing the lock.

Sunday, January 16, 2011

funny junk

--what do men and mascara have in common?-- they run at the first sign of emotion
-- i ran up the door, closed the stairs, said my pajamas, and put on my prayers. Turned of the bed.. and hoped into the light... all because you kissed me goodnight
--don't hate me because i'm beautiful! Hate me because... well....okay! Hate me because i'm beautiful.
-- I smile because i have no idea what's going on
-- click your heels and say " i need a life, i need a life"
--to catch me, you gotta be fast, to find me you gotta be smart, but to be me... damn! you gotta be kidding!
-- i am independent, and abusive... stay out of my way!
-- sarcasm keeps you from telling people what you really think of them

ranndomm

--that moment when you check your phone right before you get a text and it makes you feel like freakin jesus
--back then it was called slavery... now it's called chores
--dear people u cuss a lot- kiss my ascot, shut the front door, you son of a biscuit! u just got told!
--"stalking" is such a strong word, i prefer "intense research of an individual"
--1 universe, 9 planets, 7 seas, 7 continents, 809 islands, 204 countries, and i had the unfortunate luck of meeting you

Friday, January 7, 2011

haha found this on fb and thought it was funni

Bacon is Bacon, eggs are eggs. Don't let a guy between your legs. he says, "you're cute", he says "you're fine". then 9 months later he says "not mine".

Sunday, January 2, 2011

My time to vent

Where did life go? Why did it run away? And why does everything have to change? I feel like i'm falling apart peice by peice and at the same time i'm trying to pick the peices up, but as i pick one up, another one falls. I can't keep up. I'm standing here at the beginning of the race of life and they shoot the gun to start but i am being pulled back as everyone else in my life runs full speed ahead farther, and farther until i can't hear or see them anymore. There are days i wish i wasn't me. I don't know who i would be, but someone who isn't in so much pain. If something happened to me, i feel the only people who would care is my family. I have no real friends anymore. They don't make an effort to talk to me anymore so my guess is they don't really care. Ofcourse, i didn't have the perfect life before either. It wasn't really that great either but i wouldn't have given it up for anything. They youth group, my second family, has forgotten me. They go day to day like nothing has changed, and in their mind it hasn't, people come and go. But i thought i meant more to them. Your friends sit there and tell you they will miss you so much and crying.. and then you never hear from them. They just let you walk away. I wish someone would stop me from walking cause my legs are getting tired, and so is my heart. I can't take the hurt and tears anymore. Maybe if someone understood, or got me, it would be easier. Nobody cares though. They are too busy, caught up in their own lives to notice when i pass by. They think i'm just another girl going about my day. What they don't know is that i'm trudging along. trying so hard to keep going. i just want to lay down. What if i did? Would someome pick me up? I might look good on the outside, but that's because i'm under a cover. it's blocking the appearance underneath that is a beaten up mess, a dying soul, a shattered heart, and tired eyes. But i will keep it covered for as long as i can. But holes are forming in my cover. Things are peircing and poking holes in it. and it is something tape can't fix. I wish i could just sleep because in my dream life, things are the way i want them, and everyone is there. but i know with sleep, comes the time to wake up, like someone shakes you back into reality. I sometimes i wish i would have never met any of those people. It doesn't seem like it mattered to them anyway. It's easier to have never felt the happiness then to go through the torture when it ends. I live with scars on my heart, that i feel everyone can see. They are nothing compared to the pain that put them there.



--------I have contemplated putting this on here. I wrote this right after school started, when i was at my weakest and hurting the most. Under my cover i am slowly healing and am able to take parts of it off. things have gotten better and life is getting easier.

it's like we're on different pages

-- we already missed out on so much of each other's lives. So why are we letting each other miss even more.
--I never said it would be easy, i only said it would be worth it. I never said there wouldn't be tears, i just promised to be there if there were. I never said it would be true love, i only said you'd know if it was. i never promised  it would be forever, i only said to love unconditionally and generously with no recognition of time. i never said to hold on at all costs, i only said one day you'd have to let go and be free. i never said you'd get the rainbow without getting the rain, i only said the sun is always brighter than the storm. i never said you wouldn't cry, or feel like your heart had died. I never said you wouldn't change inside. If i had, i'd have lied.
--please tell me everything will work out fine.
--isn't this the moment where one of us is supposed to say, "this is rediculous, we love each other, all couples go through this, lets give it another try." ?
--Does it hurt you to know that we haven't spoken in days? Does it hurt you to know we can't look at each other without looking away? Does it hurt you to know that everything we had as friends is gone? Does it hurt? Cause it's hurting me.
--The last year of my life has been like a wide-awake nightmare of conflicting emotions. But no matter how bad it got, one thing kept me going, us. Our bond, our connection, whatever you want to call it. It made me feel like i wasn't alone, like i was part of something special. So i'm not whining about being friends, or not being friends. It's just that... for the first time in a long time...I'm not feeling that connection anymore. And it scares me. 
-- When all this began, we'd knew there'd be a price to pay. Too late now to turn away. We have come too far. I know we'll find a way.
--Sometime you have to take a step back to see what's really going on. Maybe that's what we both really need to do right now...find our balance again.