I'm experiencing life at a rate of several WTF's per hour

-- no, you're wrong, just sit there in your wrongness and be wrong.
-- "are you hurt?" "no, i'm just bleeding for fun!"
-- "OMG you're so gay!" "Bitch, i'm straighter than the pole you dance on."
-- i heard you are good in algebra. can you substitute my X without asking Y
-- sure god created man before woman. but then again, you always make a rough draft before creating the final masterpiece.
-- dear vodka, we had a deal last nigh. you were supposed to make me funnier, smarter, and a better dancer. i saw the video...we need to talk.
-- dear weekend, i swear the weekdays mean nothing to me. you're the one i want to be with.
-- Dear Ex, i like your new girlfriend, what breed is she?
-- i swear everything's funnier when you have to be quiet
-- we change, we grow up, we fuck up, we love, we hurt, we are human.
-- I'm not a bitch, i just have a low bullshit tolerance.
-- if people could read my mind, i'd probably be put in a mental institution or jail.
-- keep talking shit. i'm just impressed you learned how to open something besides your legs.