some random quotes

-of all the people i know.... you're one of them
- one out of 4 americans are mentally retarded so if 3 of your friends are fine...... you're in trouble.
- gay burglars broke into our house last night, all they did was rearrange the furniture.
- never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid doing completely
- unique is an understatement, im just messed up
- hi, i'm probably home, i'm just avoiding someone i don't like. leave a message, and if i don't call you back, you'll know it's you.
- Death #1 killer in the u.s.
- why is it when you're little your parents teach you to walk and talk but when you're older all you hear is sit down and shut up.
- 2 words guy's hate- don't and stop- unless you put them together.
- no one's a virgin, life screws us all.
- FACT- every hot guy is either 1)gay, 2) fictional, or 3) taken
- Dear teacher, save the trees- don't give us homework
- girls are armed with attitude and we know how to use it
- when your ex boyfriend gets a new girlfriend she is automatically considered a slutty whore.
- I watch CSI, NCIS, and criminal mind, I know how to make your death look like an accident.
- girls are like burger king, have it your way, but don't go crazy
- Stop puttin me on hold for her... i'm not your plan b
- We are the queens of gossip, we know everything, so don't even try
- giving your friend the "what the hell" look during a test
- someday you're prince charming will come. mine just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.
- the older i get the less i care
- dear boys, when girls say "k" you should know we're pissed
- I wonder how police on bikes arrest people "alright get in the basket"
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